How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
Randomize
