Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I have aggressive nipples.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Randomize
