Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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