why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
Randomize
