i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
the room spins SO much faster in panama
Is it penis luge time yet?
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
Randomize
