once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
Randomize