I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
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