grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize