we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
