Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
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