I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
Randomize
