So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
Randomize