he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Randomize
