I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
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