Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
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