You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
Randomize
