Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
one word: firstdatebathroomanal
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
Houston, we have a blender
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
Randomize
