remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
Randomize
