Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
