check it out our google latitudes are spooning
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize
