I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
There was a time I was reining queen of Sunday funday... And at that same time I also weighed 20 pounds more, had the morale of a spearmint rhino stripper, and woke up most mornings asking more questions than fucking Barbara Walters. I think I just wrote my own epitaph.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
Randomize
