what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Randomize
