And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
I smell like Dick and happiness
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
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