I feel like I'm in dance class right now
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
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