just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Randomize
