and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize
