I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
Randomize
