I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
