I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
My day in three words: secret purse cake
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
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