i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
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