Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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