she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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