her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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