But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
Why are your pants in the freezer?
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
