mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Panties = found
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