mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
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