you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
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