Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
Randomize
