You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize
