I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
Randomize
