I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
farters have to be the big spoon...
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Randomize
