your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
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