why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
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