my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
