omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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