Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
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