i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Randomize