Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Randomize
