You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
Randomize
