We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
Randomize
